Marriage

Well, getting married and moving to China. That's what's going on in my life. I guess that means that I will have even more Chinese adventures to add to this collection. I am going to get better at writing in here. It's just been a while.

It's hard not to have internet. There is so much we rely on the internet for. Outside of my iphone I really don't do much online anymore because I don't have it. Living in the boondocks has changed my life.
I now chase cows, fix fence, shoot coyotes, and chase away racoons on a daily basis. It's so insanely different for this city girl. :)

Anyways. Just wanted to update really quickly to say that I will be updating more and more as life continues to change. I can't believe how far I've come in just 2 years. Really just 1 year. It's amazing the things DAD has done for me. I am falling more and more in love with him everyday. :)

So Update

Well, it's been a while. I haven't been traveling. I haven't really been doing a lot of anything... except... getting a boyfriend, work, farming, and throwing cookouts. So.. boyfriend. I have one. He's amazing. He makes me laugh everyday. He's super intelligent. I learn something new everyday I'm with him. He keeps life interesting. I've been MIA since Costa Rica because I've been spending most of my time with him. When he's not in class... we're pretty much together. It's a completely new experience for me to have someone to rely on. Someone who supports me regardless of my rediculousness. He laughs at me, and hugs me, and loves me. He's my best friend. God truly outdid himself this time. I had been asking for specific things, but I never imagined he would answer me with something more than I could even imagine. :) I'm a happy girl. This comfortable relationship has kept me busy. I've been spending a lot of time with our friends, Matt and Katya. I just adore them. They are a blast, and the four of us get on so well. It's so nice to have these new experiences, and to just see how God is working in our lives. Other than that... Just doing a lot of normal things. I am headed to CR again in June. My sister's baby is due June 2. I am pumped to meet sweet Ally Elizabeth, and I am going to be the best Aunt ever. It's going to be fun. Even though I'm not in paradise everyday anymore, I do get to see some incredible sunets. We have a great view just off my porch, and it's nice to see God's beauty every night. It's spring here, so all the grass is green, trees have leaves, and my plants are blooming. I have 44 buds on my rose bush. I also have 2 lilies and 2 daisys that are just beautiful. I know God is in the winter, but it's just a little harder for me to see him. It's like a renewed spirit hits me in the Spring. I could see a big difference on Friday, our first amazing day, and I was in the yard all day long. We cooked out that night. It was just incredible to feel the breeze, accomplish things, and take pride in the work around the house. God is amazing.

Praises

God always answers my prayers.

I struggle with why bad things happen to good people. This life is unfair. Why do good men die young? Why do bad men live longer to abuse their families? Why do good families suffer so much loss from tragedy and cancer? All these questions and more leave my heart aching daily. It takes every ounce of my strength to keep from crying on Sunday mornings when there are new announcements about the Cotham family. Young Jeremy with leukemia and mom with breast cancer. How is this ok?

I miss Kenny today. My heart is still broken for those young children.

In spite of all of this, God answers prayers. He is present and listening. He does not promise life to be easy or pain free. He does promise to be faithful. I spend a lot of time praying for certain things. Sometimes it rakes a while to get an answer. Sometimes it's immediate. This certain prayer was answered yesterday. I have been praying for this thing for over a year now. Praise God for yesterday. I am praying another prayer now. I know God us taking his time with this one. His timing is more perfect than mine. I have complete trust and faith. My God loves and adores me. He wants my life to be extraordinary. The patience and pain are what make it that.

My brother sat by me in church yesterday

Homecoming

There are rare times in my life that I am truly happy to just get home. Just in the last year have I acquired this desire to be home. I like my bed. I like my little house. It's my own. Decorated and my things. I dont' love the farm, but I'm adjusting.

I was gone for a little over a month, and I was truly just ready to be back in a routine. I enjoy being with my friends. I have always been blessed with great great friends. I have a love for being with people. I finally have a few friends here that I absolutely love being around. We laugh so much, and just have a great time being together. The quality time is magnificent.

I am so incredibly blessed. My friends took me out for a birthday dinner friday night. It was marvelous. Chinese buffet, and Books-a-Million. My favorites. It was absolutely fantastic. I am so blessed to have friends who do things for me. They did all this without question. Katya even got me gifts. totally awesome. :) I am loving 2011.

Funny Story: Standing in line at the chinese place, this lady stops and comments on my tan. She asked if I was tanning. I said no, I had just gotten back from a trip. She asked where I had been. I told her Costa Rica... she cooed and then hugged me. Hmm.... I did not know her. I love hugs from people, but I did not know her.

Get out of that Funk

Well... like I said. I had been in a funk all day today. I know part of it had to do with the guests I have here. There is a such thing as common curtesy. What do you think entitles you to be rude to me? I am a human being. I have feelings...

Anyways.. total funk. I know what it had to do with mostly, but I'm not that girl. I never thought I would be the type to get in a funk because of such a silly reason. When did I become this girl? When did I start to think about these things? silly.

So.. tonight Mrs. Ruth and I went to Flamingo Beach to watch the sunset and get some boogie boarding in. We took a few pics, and then I headed out with the board. The waves were coming in stages of large and then a break for a while. I finally get past the break, and we have a lull in waves. I started to paddle in because there was a big one to catch. Well, it ended up being huge, and not only did it catch me, but it flipped me in every direction possible. First, it head slammed me into the sand flooring. Mostly had a hurt jaw, but now my neck and body are sore. Then it tossed me to and fro. I could not find the surface for air. I was also struggling to find my swimsuit bottoms at my ankles. I finally broke the surface, and was trying to pull my swimsuit on, and look for the boogie board. Some guy was coming to see if i was ok, and i was still trying to get my swimsuit on. So.. the big waves just kept on coming. Hardest workout of my life to get the board and get back to shore. I went back out without the board and it was a little easier, but still large scary waves. I was caughing up salt water all evening. My whole body got exfoliated. So.. I almost drown. yup. it was awesome. i love boogie boarding.

My near death experience, along with the most incredible sunset I have ever experienced, brought me out of my funk. Reminded me of what I do have right here in front of me. To appreciate everything that God gives me. He will give me the desires of my heart. Right now, my heart is desiring some incredible things, and I'm being patient waiting for them to be given to me. My God is truly an incredible, powerful, magnificent God. I love to worship and praise him.

Throughout this tough day, I have had the song Amazing Love stuck in my head. Not sure why, but I have always loved this song. It means so much, and speaks exactly what I think I was thinking about today.

Amazing Love
How can it be
That, you, my God
would die for me?

This just kept playing over and over in my head today. That is an incredible love that I get to experience everday. My pray is that my friends and family feel this love as well. I can not wait for our day in Heaven, and the Love we will be filled with in His presence. I am truly blessed, and out of my funk.

Attitude Adjustment

For some reason, today I'm feelingrather... uneasy? out of whack? Just kind of having an off day. I'm not sure if it's because I'm homesick, or weather, or just discontentment. I am letting the outside world effect me right now. I'm letting other people determine my mood and how I'm approaching things today. Honestly... I need a good hug.

I don't get enough good hugs anymore. That's what I miss about college. Everytime I see/saw my friends, they hugged me. I mean great strong, healthy hugs. A hug can completely help turn a day around. It makes all the difference to feel the love and support from a true hug.

The weather today is cloudy. This never happens. It's dry season.. it's dry until May. Today it's rainy and cool. I enjoy the nice cool 78 degrees. It's refreshing. I just wonder if this is the reason I am feeling weird.

Ruth has been amazing. We have found so much cool stuff. We have definitely been adventurous and crazy. We have enjoyed every bit of our time together. Tomorrow morning will be church and then to pick up my parents from the aeropuerto. Then Monday is my last day. I have the day planned. Paradise with a picnic and then nice dinner. I'm rather excited about paradise for the day. I guess i should pack at some point, and also make sure I have everyone's souveniers. I'll check into that today. Make a list and organize. I love organizing.

I'm ready to be back in Texas.

Work of Art

Last night one of the most amazing sunsets I have ever gotten to experience. The sun was radiant, and shining through the clouds above. It reminded me of this book my mom used to read me. It was something about a man going to Heaven and painting the sunrise and sunsets everyday.



God truly is an artist. He paints the most magnificent wonders for us to see everyday. I might complain sometimes because I'm in Longview. I might not be as content as I think I would be living on the Ocean, but I am going to watch for God's amazing artwork. I see it in the people around me in Longview. I am completely blessed to have happy, peaceful souls to create the same in me.

Today I found my place on earth. I found a place that is beautiful, quiet, and take your breath away amazing. The water was strong, and just showed God's great power. The rocks were a reminder of the interruptions in life, but how perfect they make everything. The waves were perfect for surfing, but only because of the way the rocks interrupted the tide. This is a perfect example of life. The rocks in life might be hard to get over or through, but the outcome is perfect in all God's ways. They create the perfect adventures in life.

I am in awe of my God today. I am grateful for Mrs. Ruth, and her encouragement. I am blessed to have her here when I needed some company the most. Not only company, but reassurance. She has given me this at the perfect time in my life. She has just spoken words of kindness and wisdom since getting here. I am truly truly blessed. She has been a blast because she is just as adventurous as I am. She loves to explore, get lost, and find God's magnificent creation. This is exactly the adventure I love. It's a great last few days in paradise.

I am ready to get home. I miss a puppy, my house, and a few special people. :) I will not complain about the cold. I will be incredibly content, and I will see God's work of art daily in my life.

Psalm 37:4
"Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."

Passport

My passport expires March of 2014. This happens to be 2 months after I turn 30. I got it a couple months after my 20th birthday. It's kind of a cool thing to get an entire decade in one passport. I have had new pages sewn in, and am hoping to fill those up. I have covered Asia, Australia, and a lot of Central America.

What I have left is Europe, Africa, and South America. I have particular cities I want to see... and here's my list. My travels are not limited to these cities, but they are the certain places that I want to visit.

1. Fiji
2. Maritius
3. The Seychelles
4. Santorini Greece
5. The Cinque Terre Italy
6. Venice
7. European Alps (hiking the ridge)
8. Rio De Janero Brazil
9. Easter Island
10. Cape Horn
11. Antarctica
12. Vancouver
13. British Virgin Islands
14. Bali
15. Spain
16. Ireland
17. Chang Mai Thailand
18. I want to take the Transiberian Train

These are places I have yet to see, and desire to visit. There are lots of places between all of these that I will get to see along the way. I know a lot of these I won't get to see before I'm 30, but to get to go to each continent before I'm 30 is a priority.

I just need a travel buddy.. or a couple. so I'm taking apps now. :)

Bounce Back Person

Romans 8:28 and we KNOW that in ALL things God works for the good of all those who LOVE him, who have been called according to his purpose.

I want to be a bounce back person. When bad things happen around me or to me, I want to let them roll right off my back. I want to see how God is using it for GOOD in my life.

I want to be a palm tree. The palm tree was made to bend accordingly, but it won't break. When a storm comes it doesn't think... this is it. This is the one that will break me. Nope. He knows that God has designed him to bounce back up when the winds stop trying to blow him over. The "palm tree" has power behind it. The root system actually grows stronger during those rough times. When it bounces back, it comes back even stronger than before. I want to be a palm tree.

Psalm 92:12 " The righteous will flourish like a palm tree..."

The key is to stay in agreement with God. If you will stay in his favor and look to him through the hard times and the attacks from the devil.. then you will become a bouce back person.

I think I'm a pretty good bounce back person already, but I think I need to work harder on seeing the positive through the troubles. I need to grow stronger through the trials, instead of just getting through them. I want to GROW in God, knowing without a doubt that he will carry me through.

Costa Rican Fiesta

Well, tonight I got out of the hotel and found some culture. I have been feeling a little couped up, and Tanya called to see if i wanted to go to the Potrero Fiesta. This was a definite yes for me. I needed to get out, and especially experience some Costa Rican culture. So... here's my story.

We got there just after 6 pm. Apparently this is early. It's set up like an American carnival would be, except with a make-shift rodeo ring in the middle. So since there aren't many people, we mill about a little.

We see Mr. and the 2 Ms. Fiestas. They are dressed in Cowboy???? girl??? gear? The boy looked like a cowboy. The girls.. well, one did. Jean shorts, belt, red sports bra, leather vest with fringe, and cowboy boots. She looked good. The other girl was wearing the same thing, except she had a pair of the biggest fake boobs I've ever seen poking out of her waaay too small sports bra, and was wearing fishnets that came all the way up to the bra. ???? what?

There is a mechanical bull. We watch the "Cowgirls" ride it. Slowly, boring. Then we walk around to see what food and rides there were. The only ride anyone over the age of 4 could ride were some legit bumper cars. We definitely put that on the "to do when more people are here" list.

At this point we go sit down so Michael can eat a little. This is when they start playing American Rap music and the Mr and Ms. Fiestas are "line dancing". Just because you stand in a line... does not make it a line dance. They of course were doing their own booty shaking, and it was not appropriate for the 8 year old twins to be seeing. Once the Ludacris song started.. explicit.. we had to get up and walk away.

Finally enough people are around to ride the bumper cars!!! I am just going to say.. I am going to have massive bruises. Ouch. We hit on car head on, and broke the headlight because the bumper didn't work well enough. We were going that fast. Legit.

Now they start announcing the bull show. I didn't take any pictures, but I should have. We walk over and everyone is crowded around and on top of this flimsy wooden fence thing. There were 5 bars with about 1'5 between each. It stood about 8 feet tall. I stood back about 10 feet from it and the crowd. I should start now with telling you what my dad said. "Heidi, you need to go to the fiesta because the bulls chase the guys around and kill them."

I did not believe him. First bull comes running out with rider on top. There are about 15 other guys in the ring who want the bull to chase them around. The bull runs straight for my fence area. I step back a little, and watch as the crowd barely moves away from the unsturdy fence. The people on top are jumping to this side, but staying on top. There is a young girl. 13ish who is on top, and as the bull hits the fence, she flies off and down into the ring. She is laying there unconscious as the bull is running back towards her. The men are able to distract him, and a group of men come and carry her off to the ambulance. She didn't wake up.

Another thing. After the man falls off the bull I heard a band playing. A marching band and sure enough, in the stands, is a marching band playing "half-time music". Then during actual half time, they came out and played in the arena with a legit drumline, and dancers.

The rest of the night was not this eventful, but there was a whole lot of stupidity in that ring. Men just laying on the grass... looking bored. Even one of the church members, father of 5, got out there to have the bull chases him. His wife Kerrie was next to me, and not OK with the situation.

After watching this and visiting for a while, we decided to get some dinner and head out. At this point, more and more people have shown up. If the kid is under 5, their parents have dressed them in their finest clothing, bathed them, and put bows in their hair. The young ones are to show off. Some of the women are in heels. We are in a dirt, very uneven, field. Needless to say... there were a few twisted ankles.

For dinner there was chinese street food. meat on a stick, chow mien, dan chow fan, and double friend chicken. There were Churros, and Churro Rellenos, and candy apples. Then there was corn on the cob, and some corn pancake with sour cream. hmmm... not exactly what I call Fiesta food, but to each his own.

All in all.. a good cultural experience. Michael, Tanya, and the kids have quickly become one of my favorite families down here. Tonight getting to know Dave and his family was great. Their 5 kids are all awesome and cool. Intimidatingly cool. To recap: legit, painful bumper cars; greasy food; slutty cowgirls; mechanical bull that only went slow; bad music; marching band; and girl hurt badly by bull 10 feet from me. Costa Rica.

Sunsets Are My Favorite

Psalm 113:3 From the rising of the sun to the place where it sets, the name of the LORD is to be praised.

Christian Family

Something that never ceases to amaze me in ALL of my travels, is the small Christian world we live in. I am continually running into people that I'm connected to through other Christians. Even if we don't have anyone in common, it's amazing to see how quickly they all accept me and we become family.

When we were in Vietnam, 2 years ago, we went to church at an English school. The missionaries that were living there and working were a couple from Oklahoma. They had worked with my uncle for years in NE OK. It was so random. There was also a girl there that I went to college with. I had no idea she was there.

Things like this happen all the time to me. Being in Costa Rica right now.. that has not happened, but something extraordinary has. I have found a family. There are a few couples and families here who have just taken me in, and made me apart of their family. They take me to lunch, dinners, beaches, and even leave their kids with me. It's such a blessing.

This trip has been a little different. I'm not here for travels really. I can't leave the house much since I"m here to work. I'm here to watch the house, the maids, and take care of things around the hotel. So... I've been rather bored. Other than great friends skyping me for hours... and saving me.. i've been really bored. Today was no exception. I even got bored after only about an hour in the pool. Thankfully, as soon as I got out of the pool, Tanya called and came to pick me up. She took me to lunch, and for a great drive and visit. It's so interesting to learn about people and their histories.

I am so incredibly blessed to be part of this "family". My travels are far from over. I know that I have so much ahead of me... and I hope that all of my travels are as blessed as my past ones, with meeting and running into "family". It's an incredible world we live in. Dangerous and scary, but mostly incredible.

About Me

Twenty random things about me...

1. I like to be alone sometimes.

2. I love learning new things about people and life.

3. I have an awesome relationship with my mom and her side of the family.

4. I love to read random books about anything.

5. Deep Down.. I don't want to be alone forever. I want to get married and have a Christian family, but not for a long while.

6. I like when my friends phone me randomly to hang out and catch up.

7. I love to laugh

8. I like hunting, camping, and fishing.

9. I am extremely loyal.

10. I love to talk to people that I knew from way back when adn see how their lives have changed.

11. My mom never allowed me to use knives.. still she doesn't..

12. I'm a klutz.

13. I love to drive and jam.

14. I like to walk.

15. I am an adrenaline junkie...

16. I miss college...

17. I want to move back to Australia.

18. I love the Ocean and Beach and how the sky looks at night when i'm walking on the beach.

19. I love to buy shoes, but hate to wear them.

20. I love the adventures I have everyday, and the uncertainty of tomorrow... mostly the freedom to move whenever and whereever I want.

Amazing Love

Amazing Love, how can it be that you MY King would die for ME? Amazing Love I KNOW IT"S TRUE.

Crucified, laid behind a stone. You lived to die, rejected and alone. Like a rose trampled on the ground. You took the fall and thought of ME above ALL.

Fear not, for I have redeemed YOU; I have summoned YOU by NAME; YOU are mine. When you pass through the waters I will be with YOU; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you WILL NOT be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord, YOUR God, the Holy One of Israel, YOUR Savior. -Isaiah 43:1-3

What an amazing thought. God knows me intimately and personally and has called me out of the crowd by my name to be his child. He wants to carry me through life and not let me get consumed. He is my Savior. He doesn't promise a life of no pain once I am consumed with him.. or even moments of lonliness on Earth. He does promise to help me through those. I am never truly alone. He is always holding me and taking care of me. He is in control of my life and my plans and where I am headed. He is in complete control.

I believe this is one area that it's OK to be selfish in. Each of us needs to be selfish in realizing that all of these "you"s are us. We need to share these things with others so they too can be selfish in knowing it was for them. It sounds weird.. but it's right.. you can be selfish and share. It was for you personally that he died. All of us, but you were at the top of his mind. He was thinking about you and your life to come.

Memories

memory: playing in the rain in Brisbane... first time.. and I jumped off the dock into the brisbane river and swam around! It was a fun fun thing. Except it was hard to keep my jeans up when I was getting out.

The nets to keep the flies off our faces in the Outback.

Camo.. the ATV guide at King Ranch.

The huge rats at Noosa.

The amazing bus rides getting to know some of the best people in the World. This includes Dusty forgetting I was a girl... Oh! And all the nights being serenaded by Dusty. :)

One of my favorite memories... the first time we walked down to Sidney Harbor and saw the Sidney Opera House. It took my breath away. It was our first night in Sidney.. we just walked upon it. It brought tears to my eyes to see something so incredible up close.

The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still. -Exodus 14:14

Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, Before you were born I set you apart. - Jeremiah 1:5

Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. -Matthew 6:34

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness for they will be filled. -Matthew 5:6

Do to others as you would have them do to you. -Luke 6:31

A new world, coming to me. Made just for me and those that I love. My Christian family. A loud voice said "now the dewlling of God is with men, and he will live with them. God himself will be with them adn be their God." No more sadness, tears, or hurt for that is gone with the first. From the throne bellowed "I am making everything new!" "These words are trustworthy and true." He is the alpha and Omega, beginning and end. He provides the water of LIFE. He who overcomes will inherit and be my son. Nothing evil will ever enter this new world. This perfect world. Jewels, crystal, and angels make up this new world. They walk along the gold street, and sit by the crystal sea. The Lord God Almighty is it's temple and it's light. His glory shines for all to see and worship. There will be songs of praise and honor. There will be a feast and joyous music to fill the air. The gates will never shut and there will be no darkness or night. Nothin impure will come near it. Only the names written in the Lambs book of Life will enter. -Paraphrase of Revelation 21

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. FOr our light adn momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen, for what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal. -2 Corinthians 4:16-18

BJ did the power walk in the middle of Noosa for an audience... :)

So Truly Blessed

Where you go, I'll go. Where you stay, I'll stay. When you move, I'll move. I will follow you.
All your ways are good. All your ways are sure. I will trust in you alone. Higher than my sight. High above my life. I will trust in you alone. -Chris Tomlin

This morning.. these words spoke to me. It seems that life finally slows down and lines up. Things start to fall in place. I find contenment. I am eager for the possibilities. Then "it's bad timing" happens. Things start to fall out of place. Uncertainty sets in. People make suggestions on changes I need to make. Jobs start to fall through.

I do trust you, Father. I know you're leading me. I know my path is secure in You. Please just make it all come together. I promise to continue to adore you through it all. I will not let the Devil win this battle. I will fight! With your strength and power I will win.

Guide my steps. Lead me to do your will. I don't want to move. I don't want to find another job. I don't want to continue fighting for my place everyday. I want to continue to serve you in the way I have been for the last year. If it is your will to move me... then do so. Please just help me.

The lyrics above are exactly what I'm feeling today. I vow to love as God loves, and who he loves. I promise to go where he goes. I promise to trust in him alone. You can't trust humans. Only God's ways are good. I will be in that way.

There is so much heaviness... But i have a faithful and true God who is going to get me through this. I do know that he is going to guide me. I do know that he will reveal his will. I'm getting a little impatient today...

Be blessed this week.

Pooped On

I got pooped on by a bird yesterday.

Revelation

Well, I am embarking on a study of Revelation. This is one of the books that I start to read, but never quite read the whole thing. I always skip the middle. I got a workbook to help me through it. I am going to do this one every morning along with my daily reading. We shall see.

The thing that touched me most today was verse 3 of chapter 1. Blessed are those who read this and obey it.

I know this goes for the whole Bible, but as of late I've been searching for strength to get back in this Christian Warfare. I want to fight everyday. For the last year I have felt so weak. I've been numb.. even my prayers have no feeling. Just in the last months have I started to be revived. Now I am arming myself for this fight, and I will fight everyday.

Deserve?

This word constantly troubles me. Do I get what I deserve? By whose standards? I do not have a lift to complain about at all... I am so grateful for every blessing bestowed upon me. I am so loved, cared for, and provided for. I just wonder somedays, when is it going to be my turn?

When will I find that man that I deserve? When will I finally have that friendship that I deserve? What about that job security that I deserve?

These run through my head. As I am entering my 27th year on Earth.. I feel this is the year. This year I may not find job security. I may be uprooted once again.. I have already found those friends that I deserve. But whatever it is... This year is going to be fabulous. I can feel it in the air. I feel it when I pray.

God is answering all of my prayers and questions. I am asking for specific things in prayer now, and am seeing results. My prayers are usually all about everyone else, and very general when I pray for myself. Not this year. This year I am praying specific prayers for myself. I am focusing on anger, forgiveness, health, self-control, and love. This year will be my year.

I pray for my friends daily... and I always include a section for those that need prayers that I might not remember by name, or even know that they need them. I will continue this. My selfishness this year has nothing to do with stopping to care for my friends and family. I think with my strengthening will come only caring more about others. I can already see this change happening.

I am so incredibly blessed to have what I have. I just wonder somedays... when is it my turn?

God's Beauty

I'm doing a study on Spiritual Intimacy. Since I started today... I'm still on lesson 1. I'm doing it once a week. This morning was about Knowing God. Through his Spirit, we know him. The true Spirit of God is BEYOND our understanding. That is why he sent his Holy Spirit.. so that we can know his true Spirit.

Right now I am sitting on my parent's back porch in Costa Rica, watching the Pelican's feed, and Enjoying the magnificent Pacific Ocean. It is truly beautiful. It is a World that My God created. It is what I consider to be one of the most beautiful sites in the World. I love the Ocean. The vastness, power, and the way that it is an amazing World all it's own. There is an entire creation down there. The only place I have been that is more beautiful is the Carribbean or The Bahamas. The sunsets and rises are incredible. The bright Reds, Oranges, and Yellows.

Another place that I find truly breathtaking, are the Rocky Mountains. They take my breath away. I don't usually find beauty in cold places, but I do find them to be Magnificent. They are huge, Grand even. The colors of the snow, sun, and sets are just Amazing. The purples and blues.

One of my favorite places on Earth is Australia. It has every beauty that is offered. Beach, Mountains, Desert. There are these plunging cliffs that go straight down into the Ocean along the Southern Coast. Its amazing. Another thing that makes this country so Magnificent is the culture of the people. It forces you to fall in love with it more and more.

These are all ways that I am intimate with God. I have an intimate relationship with him because I see him everywhere. When I talk to someone, driving around, or traveling. He is everywhere. I learn more and more about Him in every experience I have in His World. It's a Magnificent thing to get to see My Dad everywhere I go.

Today I am grateful for the beauty around me, and the people who show God to me.

Amazing Powerful Designer

He created the moon that reflects the sun,
He designed this World.

Our God is a designer. I always thought of him as a creator... which he is. To know what goes into designing something, making sure all works together, and see the end product; Our God did that for this World. More importantly for our lives.

I am unsure of what my future holds right now. I am unsure of where I'm going, but I know that God is answering every prayer that I pray. I have recently received answers to prayers that I only half-heartedly prayed. They were things that I wanted, not necessarily needed. He has delivered.

The most important has been challenges. When I am not challenged often enough, I get bored and that leads to drastic changes in life. Moving, Short Hair, and new Jobs. I prayed last year for challenges that made me learn new and exciting things daily. He delivered. I am learning so much about business, life, love, and farming. My farm adventures are fun. Chasing cows, Rolling out bails of hay, and feeding chickens. All in high heels... :)

The second prayer I prayed was for good friends. I have a lack here in East Texas. Seems everyone my age is married, has kids, and are settled in their lives. I normally do OK with this type, but it seems they think I'm strange for not following that path. This year.. I have become in involved with the College Age Ministry at my church. This has brought 3 of the most amazing friends into my life. It makes me miss my college friends, but these 3 are such a blessing. They seriously walked into my life the day after I prayed for better, stronger friendships.

The third was for a relationship. He has not answered this one completely, but has offered me options. The most important thing about the options he has given me, is that I have turned down the ones I know are not good for me. 2 guys that have been brought into my life, I know are just there to be friends, learn from each other, and remind me of my standards. It's almost like a test I'm passing. While it takes restraint when I'm with them... I know in the end I will benefit from holding out. So.. while he may not have the right guy asking me out right now, and yes... I have a guy in mind, I know that he is going to bring amazingness in his timing.

God's timing and design are amazing. It all works together for the best. It all makes life worth living. His design of this World, His People, and Our Lives astounds me every morning. I have been brought to my knees so much this last month, and am so gracious for God listening to my heart, not my words.

I pray for my friends daily, and I hope that those prayers are being answered as well. Prayer is an amazing and Powerful thing, created by an Amazing and Powerful God.

Change

I have acquired a reputation in my family for bailing. I just walk out of life, and move. I make changes constantly. I don't like routine or being idle. I need new and interesting. This year I have had a lot of routine, and I take my change in small punches. I prayed for challenges to keep me interested in life in America. God delivered. Now it's a new year, and i'm leaving next week for Costa Rica. I will be spending a month taking care of my family's new hotel. This is a new challenge for me.
I know my parents are OK with the trips I take, the constant drives into Dallas, and the way I change my mind. They help me with these so that I will stay around. I am looking forward to a month in Costa Rica. I am going to tan, swim, meet people, work on my spanish... I'm happy.

Accomplishment

Today has been a day of accomplishing things. I have accomplished dealing with a little bit of that anger. I have knocked everything off my list for the day. I have accomplished a lot today. I feel a little stronger. I feel a little less tired. I feel almost complete contentment.
I won't settle for less.. I have to remind myself everyday. No matter how it might look easier, or seem better at the moment.. I will not settle.
I'm looking forward to Saturday... I pray for what God has in store for my future this semester, summer, and next fall.

Struggle

Some days are a struggle and some are just easy. Today was easy... A friend came and helped me, and things just moved smoothly. It was easy. The friendship is easy. Accomplishing things is easy. Getting things knocked off the list is easy.
Anger is hard for me these days. I have started struggling more and more with Anger. It wells up inside of me. I don't like being angry. I like to feel this happy and content feeling. I don't want to be upset with people.
I started a book last night, and every sentence was talking about People Pleasing, not taking care of yourself, and just being burnt out, exhasted.. etc. I just kept saying over and over.. That's me!! Especially the part about being exhausted and more emotional.. having meltdowns. That has been happening so much this last year. Especially since mom and dad moved.
I know I have God. I just can't feel him or his strength... I'm so weak right now.
My friends get back this week.. I could not be happier.